Post by wolflegend on Jan 31, 2010 18:54:08 GMT -5
My Last Breath
“Hold on to me, love. You know I can’t stay long.” I said to him. Him being the only one that could truly see me for myself. Him being the only one that didn’t want me to change who I am. Him being the one that I loved.
Two Months Earlier
“They’re lovely!” I told him as I smelled the bright red roses he gave me for my birthday. “You like them?” He asked me. “I do, I really do. I love them!” I told him as I hugged him. I loved the roses and I loved him. “I’m glad you do…” He whispered to me as I hugged him. “Where to now?” He asked me as we held hand in hand while walking down the street sidewalk. I held the roses in one arm and held his hand in the other hand.
“Doesn’t matter. You pick.”
“It’s your birthday,” he told me.
“That doesn’t mean I have to get my way.” I laughed.
“Sure it does...” He said as he swung both of our hands forward.
I looked at him. “Hmm… How about the carnival? It’s in town tonight. Want to go?” I asked him. “I’ll pick you up at eight then.” He said as he stopped, kissed my forehead and went into his apartment next to were we were both previously standing. I nodded at him as he blew me a kiss before he entered though the newly painted New York door.
I walked down the sidewalk. It had been raining all day. It was weird. It had never rained as much as it had today. Even for New York it was still a lot of rain. The streets were almost flooded and when you walked down the alley steps, it looked more like a waterfall then steps. I think all the rain we had today was more rain then we would usually get in a year.
I continued to walk down the side walk and then I noticed something. Something out of place. It had been raining all day, where was everyone? Why was no one else out taking walks in the mist that there was now. Surely a few people had to walk their dogs. Where was everyone?
The question pondered my mind until I got home. It didn’t ponder me anymore because when I got home I knew the reason. My mother called me in the other room and said, “Come here sweetie, look at this……” I walked into the living room from which I heard my mothers voice. “What’s going on?” I asked her as I saw the TV. My mother was sitting on the edge of the couch, slouched with her fingers laced together with her eyes trained on the TV. “Look.” She told me. I sat beside her and watched the screen.
“Officials say that the plane went down do to whether conditions and is heading toward town. They are hoping that the plane does not crash downtown, but they are still not sure yet….” I heard the woman on the TV screen say. “Here is a video sent in from someone who has a camera downtown. This is live.” She said as a screen that said ‘LIVE’ popped up on the TV. There was a big spot in the sky that kept getting bigger.
The speck in the sky kept going faster and faster, farther and farther, and it kept descending towards earth.
The woman on the TV popped back up and put her hand over her ear. “What’s that, Bill? Oh… Bad news, folks. Officials are now saying that it is a NASA space ship. It was a project that wasn’t meant to be launched until tomorrow but something malfunctioned and it set off without a pilot. It made it all the way from Texas until it stopped working. NASA has no idea what is going on right now and they are trying to regain control of it now.” She said.
I sat by my mother and put my arms around her. “Where is dad?” I asked her. She looked at me. We both knew the answer to that.
You see, my father is an astronaut and he is a pilot for the ships that NASA wants to test. He arrived in Texas yesterday and was supposed to be testing that ship that was headed towards us now. “When was he supposed to be testing the shuttle?” I asked her, part of me scared to death. “Today….” My mother responded. I put my arms around her and gave her a long hug. “Just pray that he wasn’t on yet… That’s all we can do. I have already tried to call him. He didn’t answer….” MY mother told me as she patted my hand.
I could tell she was trying to be brave. For my sake anyway. But I also knew that she wanted and looked like she was about to cry. “I’m late for work…” My mother said as she got up slowly. She left the room and went to her room.
Mother had a job at the diner downtown in Time Square. She loved the job. It gave her a chance to meet new people and see new faces for a change, but sometimes I knew she hated it…
One Month Later
It was after the funeral that my boyfriend asked me to let him drive me home. I just nodded my head. My eyes were swollen and my nose was red from sniffling. It was my father’s funeral. He had ended up being on the shuttle with a couple of others. The others made it with very severe or no injury at all, but my dad, being in the front set flying the shuttle, and the shuttle crashing in to the bridge nose first, he didn’t end up making it. They rushed him to the hospital minutes after they found him slouched over in the ruined front seat. At least I was better then my mother. My mother was driven home by my boy friends mother. My mother was in no shape to drive and so, me not having my license with me, my boyfriend offered to drive me home. I couldn’t say no to him. How was I to get home if I did say no anyhow?
My boyfriend, instead of driving me straight home, drove me to the park where we used to hang out when we were kids. He walked me over to the swinging bench and we both sat down, side by side. He hugged me and whispered in my ear. “It’s all going to be okay… I promise.” He let me go and wiped my tears with his finger. He kissed me and then looked me straight in the eyes. He knew how close I was to my dad. We were practically best friends. “Its all going to be okay. You hear me?” He told me as he shook me. I was starting to cry again. I could just nod my head. I collapsed on him and started to cry even more. My eyes were red and all I could do was cry more. He hugged me and sat there with me till night time.
“I think its time I take you home…” I heard my boyfriend say to me as he rubbed my arms. I ended up laying over on him and falling asleep. The thing I love about my boyfriend is that he is strong, smart, nice, and handsome. His short black hair, his red lips, his muscular arms, and his sweet smile. They all made him special to me. He, unlike most boys, actually thought with his brain instead of doing something stupid like trying to flip on a skateboard when he knows he can’t. He was may boyfriend. All mine.
I nodded at him drowsily. He picked me up from the swing and put me in the car. He helped me with my seat belt buckle and then closed the door softly and went to his side. It had started raining again and I could hear it beat on the windshield as he started to pull out of the park in his silver truck.
We pulled up in front of my house; the rain was now more like hail. It was huge drops that now came down instead of the tiny ones you usually see here in New York. He came over to my side and unbuckled my seat belt and put me in his arms like a baby. He got a to the steps and unlocked the door with a key my mother had given him incase of emergencies.
He walked in and set me on the couch and then covered me with a blanket. I sighed and felt him kiss my forehead. “Good night, love.” He told me as he exited my apartment and pulled out of the drive.
The next morning I woke up still on the couch covered up with a blanket. I got up from the couch and walked to the kitchen. I walked over to the fridge and opened it. I closed it back because I saw a note on the front. I tore it off of the metallic surface and read it. It was a yellow posted note that read:
‘I am off to work, sweetie, I will be home
around eight or so. Be good and
don’t get into any trouble!’
I put the note on the counter and opened the fridge back up. I picked up a brownie that was sitting on the plate and grabbed an ice water from the drawer below.
I went into the living room and turned the TV on. Yes, I was still depressed, but I was better now. I knew my father was in a better place, and that he is happy now.
I heard a knock at the front door and I set the brownie I had just gotten out of the fridge on the counter. I also sat my water on the counter along with the brownie. I went to the door and opened it. My friend was standing there. “Hey…” I said. My eyes must have been still red and my nose still red because of the look that took over on my friend’s face. “Hey, um, we are all going to the movies later tonight, do you want to come?” She asked me. “I guess it wouldn’t hurt. My mom won’t be back until later… What time?” I asked her. “Nine-ish...” She replied to me. “Sure then. That’ll be good. I think I need to get out of the house and do something tonight anyway…” I said. She nodded and said she would see me later and then turned to leave.
I went back inside and locked the door back. Then I heard the phone ring. I picked it up and I heard the sound of my boyfriend’s voice. “Hey,” I said to him into the mouthpiece of the phone.
“What ya doin’?” He asked me.
“Nothing much,”
“That’s great! Do you want to go get something to eat?”
“Sure, I’d love too!” I replied.
“Okay, meet me at Time Square.”
“Okay, I’ll see you there!” I said all excited now.
I hung up the phone after I said I loved him then went to get dressed. I raced up the stairs then raced back down. I already had an outfit picked out for today. I was all dressed. I picked up my keys from the counter, got my wallet with my license in it and then headed out the door. I got in my car and put the key in the ignition. It started and then it just started to rain. It had already been sprinkling that early day, but now it started to pour. It was hard to see.
I got closer to downtown and finally saw my boyfriend in his car waiting for me just where he told me he would be. In the middle of Time Square. I pulled into the parking lot and went to get out. I saw my boyfriend getting out, but then I reached down in the floor board to get something. He was standing in the rain beside his car with a box in his hands. It was a red box with thick, black ribbon tying it shut. It was a beautiful box and what ever it held must have been even better with the smile he had on his face. I forgot that today was Valentines Day, but I was glad I kept his present in my car.
I saw him standing there, waiting for me in the rain. I looked in my rear view mirror and everything in life seemed to slow down. A semi truck was headed straight for my car, with me in it. It seemed like only seconds before the semi truck hit me. I hit my head on the dashboard and then everything went black. The next thing I knew, I was awake again. The only thing I could see was my boyfriend above my mouth. He backed off of my and slammed my chest again. He breathed into my mouth and then I started to breathe. I gasped for air. I choked a bit and then I noticed that I had a very deep cut in my side. It looked fatal. I started to get short gasps of breath now. I felt the pain in my side and I couldn’t talk. I couldn’t find my voice.
“Are you okay?” My boyfriend asked as he held me in his arms on the ground. I could see tears in his eyes. “Yeah….” I managed to croak out. My throat was dry and my words were raspy and in whispers. He saw my cut and pressed his hand on my side to stop the bleeding.
I saw my blood all over the ground now. That’s when I noticed that the whole Time Square had been surrounded by. Everyone was watching us as the cops and fire truck arrived. The fire truck began to hose down the inflamed semi truck and my car along with it. But that was the least of my problems right now. The cops arrived and one sat next to my boyfriend and asked him what happened. He told him exactly what happened and then a medic came over to try and help me.
I winced as he put a cloth on my deep cut on my abdomen that was still bleeding. My boyfriend had blood all over him now. I lost more breath then I gained every time I breathed in or out. I was fading. Fading slowly. My vision became darker and darker until I was almost gone forever.
“Hold on to me, love. You know I can’t stay long.” I said to him. Him being the only one that could truly see me for myself. Him being the only one that didn’t want me to change who I am. Him being the one that I loved. My boyfriend.
My boyfriend just shook me and said, “No, you are going to stay with me! I can’t loose you!”
“All I wanted to say was I love you and I’m not afraid. Can you hear me?
Can you feel me in your arms? Holding my last breath,
safe inside myself, are all my thoughts of you. Sweet ruptured light it ends here tonight.”
“No! I am not going to loose you!” My boyfriend shouted to me.
“I'll miss the winter, a world of fragile things. Look for me in the white forest, hiding in a hollow tree. I know you hear me, I can taste it in your tears….”
“No! You’re not going to die! Do you hear me? Your not going to die!” He said to me.
“I love you.” I said then I let my grip from his hands fall.
I used my last breath to say I loved him. I was breathing no more. I was living no more. I was free in my dream world.
My Last Breath.
“Hold on to me, love. You know I can’t stay long.” I said to him. Him being the only one that could truly see me for myself. Him being the only one that didn’t want me to change who I am. Him being the one that I loved.
Two Months Earlier
“They’re lovely!” I told him as I smelled the bright red roses he gave me for my birthday. “You like them?” He asked me. “I do, I really do. I love them!” I told him as I hugged him. I loved the roses and I loved him. “I’m glad you do…” He whispered to me as I hugged him. “Where to now?” He asked me as we held hand in hand while walking down the street sidewalk. I held the roses in one arm and held his hand in the other hand.
“Doesn’t matter. You pick.”
“It’s your birthday,” he told me.
“That doesn’t mean I have to get my way.” I laughed.
“Sure it does...” He said as he swung both of our hands forward.
I looked at him. “Hmm… How about the carnival? It’s in town tonight. Want to go?” I asked him. “I’ll pick you up at eight then.” He said as he stopped, kissed my forehead and went into his apartment next to were we were both previously standing. I nodded at him as he blew me a kiss before he entered though the newly painted New York door.
I walked down the sidewalk. It had been raining all day. It was weird. It had never rained as much as it had today. Even for New York it was still a lot of rain. The streets were almost flooded and when you walked down the alley steps, it looked more like a waterfall then steps. I think all the rain we had today was more rain then we would usually get in a year.
I continued to walk down the side walk and then I noticed something. Something out of place. It had been raining all day, where was everyone? Why was no one else out taking walks in the mist that there was now. Surely a few people had to walk their dogs. Where was everyone?
The question pondered my mind until I got home. It didn’t ponder me anymore because when I got home I knew the reason. My mother called me in the other room and said, “Come here sweetie, look at this……” I walked into the living room from which I heard my mothers voice. “What’s going on?” I asked her as I saw the TV. My mother was sitting on the edge of the couch, slouched with her fingers laced together with her eyes trained on the TV. “Look.” She told me. I sat beside her and watched the screen.
“Officials say that the plane went down do to whether conditions and is heading toward town. They are hoping that the plane does not crash downtown, but they are still not sure yet….” I heard the woman on the TV screen say. “Here is a video sent in from someone who has a camera downtown. This is live.” She said as a screen that said ‘LIVE’ popped up on the TV. There was a big spot in the sky that kept getting bigger.
The speck in the sky kept going faster and faster, farther and farther, and it kept descending towards earth.
The woman on the TV popped back up and put her hand over her ear. “What’s that, Bill? Oh… Bad news, folks. Officials are now saying that it is a NASA space ship. It was a project that wasn’t meant to be launched until tomorrow but something malfunctioned and it set off without a pilot. It made it all the way from Texas until it stopped working. NASA has no idea what is going on right now and they are trying to regain control of it now.” She said.
I sat by my mother and put my arms around her. “Where is dad?” I asked her. She looked at me. We both knew the answer to that.
You see, my father is an astronaut and he is a pilot for the ships that NASA wants to test. He arrived in Texas yesterday and was supposed to be testing that ship that was headed towards us now. “When was he supposed to be testing the shuttle?” I asked her, part of me scared to death. “Today….” My mother responded. I put my arms around her and gave her a long hug. “Just pray that he wasn’t on yet… That’s all we can do. I have already tried to call him. He didn’t answer….” MY mother told me as she patted my hand.
I could tell she was trying to be brave. For my sake anyway. But I also knew that she wanted and looked like she was about to cry. “I’m late for work…” My mother said as she got up slowly. She left the room and went to her room.
Mother had a job at the diner downtown in Time Square. She loved the job. It gave her a chance to meet new people and see new faces for a change, but sometimes I knew she hated it…
One Month Later
It was after the funeral that my boyfriend asked me to let him drive me home. I just nodded my head. My eyes were swollen and my nose was red from sniffling. It was my father’s funeral. He had ended up being on the shuttle with a couple of others. The others made it with very severe or no injury at all, but my dad, being in the front set flying the shuttle, and the shuttle crashing in to the bridge nose first, he didn’t end up making it. They rushed him to the hospital minutes after they found him slouched over in the ruined front seat. At least I was better then my mother. My mother was driven home by my boy friends mother. My mother was in no shape to drive and so, me not having my license with me, my boyfriend offered to drive me home. I couldn’t say no to him. How was I to get home if I did say no anyhow?
My boyfriend, instead of driving me straight home, drove me to the park where we used to hang out when we were kids. He walked me over to the swinging bench and we both sat down, side by side. He hugged me and whispered in my ear. “It’s all going to be okay… I promise.” He let me go and wiped my tears with his finger. He kissed me and then looked me straight in the eyes. He knew how close I was to my dad. We were practically best friends. “Its all going to be okay. You hear me?” He told me as he shook me. I was starting to cry again. I could just nod my head. I collapsed on him and started to cry even more. My eyes were red and all I could do was cry more. He hugged me and sat there with me till night time.
“I think its time I take you home…” I heard my boyfriend say to me as he rubbed my arms. I ended up laying over on him and falling asleep. The thing I love about my boyfriend is that he is strong, smart, nice, and handsome. His short black hair, his red lips, his muscular arms, and his sweet smile. They all made him special to me. He, unlike most boys, actually thought with his brain instead of doing something stupid like trying to flip on a skateboard when he knows he can’t. He was may boyfriend. All mine.
I nodded at him drowsily. He picked me up from the swing and put me in the car. He helped me with my seat belt buckle and then closed the door softly and went to his side. It had started raining again and I could hear it beat on the windshield as he started to pull out of the park in his silver truck.
We pulled up in front of my house; the rain was now more like hail. It was huge drops that now came down instead of the tiny ones you usually see here in New York. He came over to my side and unbuckled my seat belt and put me in his arms like a baby. He got a to the steps and unlocked the door with a key my mother had given him incase of emergencies.
He walked in and set me on the couch and then covered me with a blanket. I sighed and felt him kiss my forehead. “Good night, love.” He told me as he exited my apartment and pulled out of the drive.
The next morning I woke up still on the couch covered up with a blanket. I got up from the couch and walked to the kitchen. I walked over to the fridge and opened it. I closed it back because I saw a note on the front. I tore it off of the metallic surface and read it. It was a yellow posted note that read:
‘I am off to work, sweetie, I will be home
around eight or so. Be good and
don’t get into any trouble!’
I put the note on the counter and opened the fridge back up. I picked up a brownie that was sitting on the plate and grabbed an ice water from the drawer below.
I went into the living room and turned the TV on. Yes, I was still depressed, but I was better now. I knew my father was in a better place, and that he is happy now.
I heard a knock at the front door and I set the brownie I had just gotten out of the fridge on the counter. I also sat my water on the counter along with the brownie. I went to the door and opened it. My friend was standing there. “Hey…” I said. My eyes must have been still red and my nose still red because of the look that took over on my friend’s face. “Hey, um, we are all going to the movies later tonight, do you want to come?” She asked me. “I guess it wouldn’t hurt. My mom won’t be back until later… What time?” I asked her. “Nine-ish...” She replied to me. “Sure then. That’ll be good. I think I need to get out of the house and do something tonight anyway…” I said. She nodded and said she would see me later and then turned to leave.
I went back inside and locked the door back. Then I heard the phone ring. I picked it up and I heard the sound of my boyfriend’s voice. “Hey,” I said to him into the mouthpiece of the phone.
“What ya doin’?” He asked me.
“Nothing much,”
“That’s great! Do you want to go get something to eat?”
“Sure, I’d love too!” I replied.
“Okay, meet me at Time Square.”
“Okay, I’ll see you there!” I said all excited now.
I hung up the phone after I said I loved him then went to get dressed. I raced up the stairs then raced back down. I already had an outfit picked out for today. I was all dressed. I picked up my keys from the counter, got my wallet with my license in it and then headed out the door. I got in my car and put the key in the ignition. It started and then it just started to rain. It had already been sprinkling that early day, but now it started to pour. It was hard to see.
I got closer to downtown and finally saw my boyfriend in his car waiting for me just where he told me he would be. In the middle of Time Square. I pulled into the parking lot and went to get out. I saw my boyfriend getting out, but then I reached down in the floor board to get something. He was standing in the rain beside his car with a box in his hands. It was a red box with thick, black ribbon tying it shut. It was a beautiful box and what ever it held must have been even better with the smile he had on his face. I forgot that today was Valentines Day, but I was glad I kept his present in my car.
I saw him standing there, waiting for me in the rain. I looked in my rear view mirror and everything in life seemed to slow down. A semi truck was headed straight for my car, with me in it. It seemed like only seconds before the semi truck hit me. I hit my head on the dashboard and then everything went black. The next thing I knew, I was awake again. The only thing I could see was my boyfriend above my mouth. He backed off of my and slammed my chest again. He breathed into my mouth and then I started to breathe. I gasped for air. I choked a bit and then I noticed that I had a very deep cut in my side. It looked fatal. I started to get short gasps of breath now. I felt the pain in my side and I couldn’t talk. I couldn’t find my voice.
“Are you okay?” My boyfriend asked as he held me in his arms on the ground. I could see tears in his eyes. “Yeah….” I managed to croak out. My throat was dry and my words were raspy and in whispers. He saw my cut and pressed his hand on my side to stop the bleeding.
I saw my blood all over the ground now. That’s when I noticed that the whole Time Square had been surrounded by. Everyone was watching us as the cops and fire truck arrived. The fire truck began to hose down the inflamed semi truck and my car along with it. But that was the least of my problems right now. The cops arrived and one sat next to my boyfriend and asked him what happened. He told him exactly what happened and then a medic came over to try and help me.
I winced as he put a cloth on my deep cut on my abdomen that was still bleeding. My boyfriend had blood all over him now. I lost more breath then I gained every time I breathed in or out. I was fading. Fading slowly. My vision became darker and darker until I was almost gone forever.
“Hold on to me, love. You know I can’t stay long.” I said to him. Him being the only one that could truly see me for myself. Him being the only one that didn’t want me to change who I am. Him being the one that I loved. My boyfriend.
My boyfriend just shook me and said, “No, you are going to stay with me! I can’t loose you!”
“All I wanted to say was I love you and I’m not afraid. Can you hear me?
Can you feel me in your arms? Holding my last breath,
safe inside myself, are all my thoughts of you. Sweet ruptured light it ends here tonight.”
“No! I am not going to loose you!” My boyfriend shouted to me.
“I'll miss the winter, a world of fragile things. Look for me in the white forest, hiding in a hollow tree. I know you hear me, I can taste it in your tears….”
“No! You’re not going to die! Do you hear me? Your not going to die!” He said to me.
“I love you.” I said then I let my grip from his hands fall.
I used my last breath to say I loved him. I was breathing no more. I was living no more. I was free in my dream world.
My Last Breath.